Day 30: More Thoughts on those High School Days

[anarchist_nomad]

Coincidentally, just days after my high school blast from the past, cassiopia was showing me some of her high school yearbooks today. I was struck by what a normal and pleasant experience she had had: Clubs and plays and a boyfriend. It all seemed so normal. Quite the contrast from the hell that high school was for me, what with running away from home (twice) and being kicked out of the house (many times!) and having my mother call the police on me and punching a hole in my bedroom wall and being almost continuously depressed and lonely... y'know, things like that.

I was undoubtedly the most colourful character in my high school, but I was certainly not very happy back then. I don't regret it per se, as those experiences shaped me into who I am now. Not in some abstract way, either, but in very direct ways that are obvious to me. Nonetheless, when I was a depressed teenager, I heard many people tell me to cheer up because those were going to be "the best days of my life." What a thing to tell a depressed person! Luckily, I had not believed them -- if I had, I probably would have truly been suicidal with nothing better to look forward to! However, my conversation with cassiopia made me wonder about other people's high school experiences. Which leads to my first LJ poll:

[Poll #591991]

I'll be curious to see the results on this. I have a prediction already (which I won't reveal, to keep the analysis somewhat unbiased) and I am curious to see how closely it resembles the truth.

Comments

[contrarywise]

My answer isn't really represented in your list, because it lies somewhere between "They were pretty difficult; I was glad when it was over." and "Worst years of my life!!!"

I hated high school for the most part. The only bright spots were the few teachers who did more than spew the textbook back to the class and the few friends I had in senior year. Before then, I mostly just put up with school. Senior year was also comparatively good because by then I had my grandfather's old Dodge and could leave the place under my own power after third period, which I did often. I almost refused to go on to college because I hated high school so much that I was convinced that college would only be more of the same useless crap day after day. Thankfully, my mother convinced me otherwise, and she turned out to be right.

So I can't honestly say they were the worst years of my life--I've had worse ones recently--but "pretty difficult" doesn't cut it either.

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

polymorphism was complaining about my choices last night, too. I basically see them as a one-to-five scale with an extra "N/A" option added. Still, the poll permits choosing more than one answer, so if you like, you could pick the two answers that bridge your choice...

[contrarywise]

I considered that since I noticed you had check boxes as opposed to radio buttons in your poll, but concluded that option doesn't reflect what I mean. Choosing any two of these answers means you agree with *both*, not that your answer lies somewhere between them. And that doesn't make sense logically because each point on a scale is exclusive of all other points. Your scale is not fine enough, IMO. Once again, I fall between the cracks...

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

Fair enough. Statistically speaking, I see checking both as your best option, because it will register in both scales when I look at the final histogram. If I binned more finely (as you and polymorphism both suggested), I would likely split the limited statistics that I have in terms of number of people answering... which is why I only chose five bins (plus an N/A).

[contrarywise]

Well, you know my thoughts on the matter, so essentially you have my answer to your question. I'm not gonna click any clickies myself, so you may place my response(s) where you will or ignore my comments when you compile your data--it's your poll, after all. I don't understand your objections to a more accurate scale, but I also don't have the time or energy to spend on niggling statistics.

[luxvoodoo.livejournal.com]

"being kicked out of the house (many times!) and having my mother call the police on me and punching a hole in my bedroom wall and being almost continuously depressed and lonely"

This pretty much describes my home life during my high school years. In fact, it's so similar it's scary. :-)

In your poll, I checked off "I got through them okay" because my four years kind of had a split personality. The first two years were pure hell. There was no doubt about it. Then, in my junior year, I started writing for the school paper and was hanging around people from all sorts of cliques. Suddenly, the bullies were just gone. I don't know if that's because they were reading my stuff and seeing me differently or if the people on the paper told their friends to back off. After two years of pure torture, my world at school was suddenly quiet and uneventful. This is why I'm probably more willing to make peace with my high school graduating class after twenty years. They offered me a truce during those last two years.

As for teachers and how I felt about they way they applied their craft...well, that's a whole different entry I plan on writing soon. :-)

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

Looking forward to see what it is you have to say about your teachers. Meanwhile, I am impressed that your last two years were good enough to more or less make up for the hell of the first two.

Interestingly enough, it was my first two years that weren't so bad. Sure, I was depressed and lonely, but I was still living in a shell. It wasn't until I tried braking out of that shell (in the summer before my Junior year) that the true hell really began. Maybe that's why I can't regret those years, though... I was blossoming into the person I am now and the hell was the obstacles I had to fight my way through to make it happen.

[crim-ferret.livejournal.com]

I was a computer geek at a time when nobody knew computer geeks would be making 6 figure incomes right out of high school less than a decade later. At least I had a group to hang out with. Otherwise, it was pretty abissmal. I should point out that we were living in Utah at the time and I wasn't a member of the Mormon church which locked me out of a lot of social actities. There were a few bullies, but I was fairly big for my age and after a couple of smaller individuals found out I did have limits in a rather painful fashion, I was more or less left alone by all of them. They were right. I had one teacher (one of the incompetent ones with tenure just coasting until retirement) who told the class we would remember high school as the best years of our lives. If I'd believed her, I'd have probably gone home and slit my wrists.

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

I had one teacher (one of the incompetent ones with tenure just coasting until retirement) who told the class we would remember high school as the best years of our lives. If I'd believed her, I'd have probably gone home and slit my wrists.

Couldn't agree more! What kind of idiot tries to cheer a depressed person up by telling them that things are as good as they are ever going to get?!?

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

You know....... why am I not surprised? ;)

High School days suck rocks

[fitzotter.livejournal.com]

Ok, for me that was a long long time ago but I still remember how awful it was. I shudder at the thought of my high school days. I got beat up at home a lot and ignored by catholic nuns at school. It just was not a good time in my life. The only reason I was in a Catholic high school was because my sister belonged to the order of nuns that ran the school so they felt obligated to let me attend the school. I used to come to school with large bruises and the nuns never asked what was going on at home. I attended high school with an assortment of fractures. In fact the bad back that I suffer from comes from that time period when I was thrown down a flight of stairs and fractured one of my vertebrae. So all I can say is that I managed to survive high school. I was also an outsider and had almost no friends in my school. I find it interesting that Anthony had a fairly good time in High School and I sure as hell didn't.

Re: High School days suck rocks

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

..... I don't think I have the words to respond to the hell that was your high school era experience. Holy crap. I know my adolescence was hellacious but I do know that many other people (including several on my friends list) did have it worse. As dysfunctional as my family is, at least I was never abused. Screaming matched with one's mother suck, but not the same way as being subjected to beatings.

School was Good

[xirpha.livejournal.com]

I had a wonderful time during high school. I went to a public school were most of my teachers had PH D's. They were there because they wanted to teach. I had lot of encouragement and interesting courses. When possible I was allowed to do independent study. I had three years of independent study electronics and anthropology. When the computer lab was put in I was allowed to work on the computer without having to take a class. I wrote my own computer chess program in basic. I was the head of both the chess club and the astronomy club. I was allowed to take home the astronomy club six inch reflector telescope for the summer.

It was not the best time in my life because nothing in the past can be my best time in my life. The future can always be better.

[sweetsourcat.livejournal.com]

huh... highschool. mine sounded like a sick mixture of yours and cassiopia's. i will tell you about it sometime. the ONLY thing i liked about highschool was the repetitive nature. same classes, same time every day, same people in the halls at the same time. if it weren't for that sole piece of solidity, i surely would not have made it.

[anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com]

Indeed, you should tell me about it sometime. Next karaoke is November 3rd -- I'll be there. Also, the next party at the Event Horizon will probably be one month later, on Sat Dec 3rd. Think you can make either of those?