There are two things that I have often said. Neither should be true, but they both seem to be. They are:

#1) Bad things in my life tend to come all bunched together in waves.
#2) Really bad things in my life happen to the people around me, not directly to me.

The last period in my life stretched from September 2001 until March 2002. In that time, here are just some of the things that happened: My city was attacked by terrorists and, although no one I know was killed, several of my friends were in the thick of it (stepping over dead bodies in the street, for instance). My old experiment exploded, causing $30 million of damage and requiring years to fully recover (it hasn't yet). I suffered a renal colic attack (read: kidney stone) and needed surgery to destroy it. My father's house, which we built in the 1980s, was knocked down by the new owners. A war began, with the news reaching me right at a moment where I had let my guard down. A dear friend (only in his late 40s!) suffered a heart attack that nearly killed him and eventually required a transplant that changed his life.

That was a long bad period. Fortunately, there was a much longer lull between bad periods. Unfortunately, that lull ended a little less than a month ago.

In the span of three weeks, I have had to contend with the following challenges: Comrades bashed and beaten by police at Gay Pride. The death of the mother of my primary partner. The death of the cat that another partner lived with for sixteen years. The death of a guinea pig that a close friend had lived with for five years. A family member grappling with a severe anxiety disorder that has disrupted his life. A friend who has suffered from a nervous breakdown. And my air conditioner at home needs to be replaced.

As I said, bad things happen all at once. Also, since several of these problems have had wide repercussions, for a while the cracks in the dam were appearing faster than I could plug them. And, again, the worst thing that has happened to me directly was the air conditioner unit breaking -- a costly annoyance, but eminently fixable.

I said early on that I was not going to use this LJ for whining. Indeed, I find little use in complaining that the universe it not treating you fairly. It doesn't help anything -- when you are handed a problem, the thing to do is to fix it. So lately I have spent quite a bit of time fixing things to the best of my abilities. I mention all these things in aggregate here only for the purpose of chronicling.

Now I will tentatively venture to say that this bad time may be over. There has been nothing new that has gone wrong in about five days now. Given the fast and furious pace that the hits were coming at this month, that may be significant. I'm going to keep fingers crossed, keep picking up the pieces, and we'll see if life isn't about to get much better once again...

From: [identity profile] cheshcat.livejournal.com


*soft smile* The one consistent link in this chain of events is you, hon.

I am very glad you were/are there for all of us facing these difficulties, as the idea of dealing with them without your strength, support, love, and guidance is beyond comprehension. In the meantime, you are learning to JUST BE with a problem, and I think this is also a valuable lesson for you: Yes, you could "fix" some things by lugging by parents' furniture 1,000 miles and arranging for storage. But the harder part of sitting with me while I grieve is immensely more important. And I am so very grateful that you are in my life, during all the hard times, because it makes the joyful times even sweeter and more precious.

I think the wave of bad things is passing, too. Here's a toast to healing the hurts...

and yes, please, please replace the air conditioner... ;) (Sleeping in a swamp is less fun than one might imagine...!)


Love,
Your Beeps


From: [identity profile] langs-place.livejournal.com


It does figure that the a/c is broken and he's out of town the one week that Chicago is actually hot and humid as I've warned him it should be. :)

From: [identity profile] anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com


I am very glad you were/are there for all of us facing these difficulties

You're welcome, my Love!

In the meantime, you are learning to JUST BE with a problem

Hah! Just learning a new skill for how to fix things. Apparantly, many problems are fixed if you JUST BE for awhile, so that makes it a skill worth learning.

I think the wave of bad things is passing, too. Here's a toast to healing the hurts...

So..... want some toast?

Love you lots, Sweetie!

From: [identity profile] cheshcat.livejournal.com


Hah! Just learning a new skill for how to fix things. Apparantly, many problems are fixed if you JUST BE for awhile, so that makes it a skill worth learning.

Fine. Reconstruct it that way, if you like. Just BE it, as it is a fixable-way of looking at things. Silly mips. ;P

Yes, I'd love some toast. Place me an order for Saturday....

(Miss you so much! Yay, you are coming home!)

Love your Beeps.


From: [identity profile] aqueoushumor.livejournal.com


:( I hope things look up for you! Call me when you get a chance.

From: [identity profile] anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com


Will do -- probably next week. I'll be home for about twelve days between England and Alaska, so I'll try to give you a buzz then. Miss ya!

From: [identity profile] pomoloco.livejournal.com


Sorry things have been sucky...

Between England and Alaska? What are you doing at these places? Are you ever at your job?

From: [identity profile] anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com


Thanks! *hugs*

As for the travel: England was for a meeting and a conference. I'm back now. Alaska is a vacation that [livejournal.com profile] cheshcat and I are taking next month for out 10th anniversary.

Job? What's that?

From: [identity profile] langs-place.livejournal.com


If you're as close to the end of this cycle as it seems, there are only good things to look forward to. :)

From: [identity profile] anarchist-nomad.livejournal.com


Well, I said that I am tentatively hoping that punches are finished coming in -- largely based on how fast and furious they fell this time around. Nothing new has happened in six days, so I am getting my hopes up. In contast, the last time a round of bad things happened, it lasted for six months and the punches fell at a rate of about one per month. So back then, six days of no news meant nothing -- it took months before I realized the bad times were over. There's nothing scientific about any of this, mind you, it just seems to be the way my life works. In reality, though, it is like the warning that comes with all stock -- past performance is no guarantee.
.

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