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One month ago today, I made a short and sweet LJ entry -- it consisted of a four-question poll, and little else. Much to my surprise, that entry went on to become the most commented post thus far in the nearly six years that I have been keeping this journal!
In the comments for that entry, I promised to revisit all four questions in time... sharing my own thoughts on them. Well, with one month passed since then, there's no time like the present -- so here goes:
The first pair of questions dealt with an ambiguity in the twelve-hour clock. Namely, how should we refer to midnight and noon. For each, I asked whether people considered them to be 12:00 am, 12:00 pm, both, or neither. It is my opinion that midnight is both and noon is neither. The abbreviations "am" and "pm" are, respectively, Latin for ante meridiem and post meridiem. "Meridiem" itself translates to "mid day" -- which we refer to as noon. As midnight occurs twelve hours before and twelve hours after noon, it is both 12:00 am and 12:00 pm. I feel even more strongly that noon is neither. Noon is meridiem -- how can it be either before or after itself!
These questions, of course, mainly serve to underline some of the problems with using a twelve hour clock. In many countries, including Japan[2], the more sensible twenty-four hour clock is now the norm, thus eliminating such vagueness. I myself am transitioning to using a twenty-four hour clock as the standard; besides the superior aesthetic, the switch will also eliminate certain practical problems.[3] When using a twelve-hour clock, it has been suggested that one refer to "12 m" for midnight and "12 n" for noon... but this is still ambiguous, as it clashes with an older convention of "12 mn" for midnight and "12 m" for noon (i.e., meridiem). If one must use a twelve-hour clock, best to write out "12 midnight" and "12 noon" (or just delete the "12"s altogether). So speaketh the Nomad.
The second set of questions referred to age appropriateness in dating. I found it rather encouraging to see that most of my friends feel about the same way as I do -- age itself is not a relevant factor.[4] Other attributes, such as maturity and power differences are much more important in determining whether a given pairing is appropriate.
Personally, with the exception of an adolescent fling when I was seventeen (and she was fourteen), I started my romantic life by exclusively getting involved with older women. This was not a conscious decision... but, in retrospect, I believe that I felt most of my peers to be too immature to be a good match. In my late teens, I felt far more mature than most of the others in my age group. As I got older, this age gap tended to become shrink; by the time I reached the end of my twenties, I was dating people around my age, or even slightly younger. Now, in my early thirties, I find that I date younger than myself more often than older -- though both still happen. Thus far, the greatest age gap above me was twelve years -- Resourceress was thirty-six and I was twenty-four when our relationship started -- and the greatest age gap below me is fifteen years. Looking back, it seems like most of the people I have dated were in the second half of their twenties when I began a relationship with them; this is regardless of my own age at the time.
Taking a snapshot of the present, I see that I have one partner who is currently in her early forties[5], a couple who are in their thirties, several in their twenties, and one who is in her late teens. For me, this tends to empirically confirm what I was saying about how age plays a back seat to other factors -- such as maturity, intelligence, accomplishment, et cetera -- in determining who I am attracted to.
I will end with an amusing anecdote on the subject: A few weeks ago, shortly before I left Oxford for my current travels, I went to dinner with my beloved![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
cheshcat, the beautiful miss_amaranth, and the beatific xmakina. I smiled when I realised that I was sharing a meal with my oldest partner -- who is also my longest relationship ever -- and my youngest partner -- who is currently also my newest relationship. Twas an excellent meal indeed, both in terms of food and company!
I want to thank all of my wonderful friends for participating in that poll... and also for their most excellent and thought-provoking comments! Gentle readers, I am lucky to have your collected wisdom -- and companionship -- in my life!
[1] Now without the tide! (Blame recessionary cutbacks)
[2] Where I still am for a little longer.
[3] Such as the fact that, about every year or two, I accidentally oversleep because I set my alarm clock to ring at "pm" instead of "am". Or I set the alarm properly but the time was incorrectly set.
[4] As always, we are assuming that both people are of the legal age of consent.
[5] Though she is not the only partner in their forties that I have ever had. Thus far, the oldest person I have dated was forty-four when the relationship ended. The youngest, for contrast, was the aforementioned fourteen year old that I dated in 1992. It still boggles my mind when we talk -- as we are still friends -- and she tells me about her two children.
In the comments for that entry, I promised to revisit all four questions in time... sharing my own thoughts on them. Well, with one month passed since then, there's no time like the present -- so here goes:
The first pair of questions dealt with an ambiguity in the twelve-hour clock. Namely, how should we refer to midnight and noon. For each, I asked whether people considered them to be 12:00 am, 12:00 pm, both, or neither. It is my opinion that midnight is both and noon is neither. The abbreviations "am" and "pm" are, respectively, Latin for ante meridiem and post meridiem. "Meridiem" itself translates to "mid day" -- which we refer to as noon. As midnight occurs twelve hours before and twelve hours after noon, it is both 12:00 am and 12:00 pm. I feel even more strongly that noon is neither. Noon is meridiem -- how can it be either before or after itself!
These questions, of course, mainly serve to underline some of the problems with using a twelve hour clock. In many countries, including Japan[2], the more sensible twenty-four hour clock is now the norm, thus eliminating such vagueness. I myself am transitioning to using a twenty-four hour clock as the standard; besides the superior aesthetic, the switch will also eliminate certain practical problems.[3] When using a twelve-hour clock, it has been suggested that one refer to "12 m" for midnight and "12 n" for noon... but this is still ambiguous, as it clashes with an older convention of "12 mn" for midnight and "12 m" for noon (i.e., meridiem). If one must use a twelve-hour clock, best to write out "12 midnight" and "12 noon" (or just delete the "12"s altogether). So speaketh the Nomad.
The second set of questions referred to age appropriateness in dating. I found it rather encouraging to see that most of my friends feel about the same way as I do -- age itself is not a relevant factor.[4] Other attributes, such as maturity and power differences are much more important in determining whether a given pairing is appropriate.
Personally, with the exception of an adolescent fling when I was seventeen (and she was fourteen), I started my romantic life by exclusively getting involved with older women. This was not a conscious decision... but, in retrospect, I believe that I felt most of my peers to be too immature to be a good match. In my late teens, I felt far more mature than most of the others in my age group. As I got older, this age gap tended to become shrink; by the time I reached the end of my twenties, I was dating people around my age, or even slightly younger. Now, in my early thirties, I find that I date younger than myself more often than older -- though both still happen. Thus far, the greatest age gap above me was twelve years -- Resourceress was thirty-six and I was twenty-four when our relationship started -- and the greatest age gap below me is fifteen years. Looking back, it seems like most of the people I have dated were in the second half of their twenties when I began a relationship with them; this is regardless of my own age at the time.
Taking a snapshot of the present, I see that I have one partner who is currently in her early forties[5], a couple who are in their thirties, several in their twenties, and one who is in her late teens. For me, this tends to empirically confirm what I was saying about how age plays a back seat to other factors -- such as maturity, intelligence, accomplishment, et cetera -- in determining who I am attracted to.
I will end with an amusing anecdote on the subject: A few weeks ago, shortly before I left Oxford for my current travels, I went to dinner with my beloved
cheshcat, the beautiful miss_amaranth, and the beatific xmakina. I smiled when I realised that I was sharing a meal with my oldest partner -- who is also my longest relationship ever -- and my youngest partner -- who is currently also my newest relationship. Twas an excellent meal indeed, both in terms of food and company!I want to thank all of my wonderful friends for participating in that poll... and also for their most excellent and thought-provoking comments! Gentle readers, I am lucky to have your collected wisdom -- and companionship -- in my life!
[1] Now without the tide! (Blame recessionary cutbacks)
[2] Where I still am for a little longer.
[3] Such as the fact that, about every year or two, I accidentally oversleep because I set my alarm clock to ring at "pm" instead of "am". Or I set the alarm properly but the time was incorrectly set.
[4] As always, we are assuming that both people are of the legal age of consent.
[5] Though she is not the only partner in their forties that I have ever had. Thus far, the oldest person I have dated was forty-four when the relationship ended. The youngest, for contrast, was the aforementioned fourteen year old that I dated in 1992. It still boggles my mind when we talk -- as we are still friends -- and she tells me about her two children.
